The Art of a “Bromance”

The+Art+of+a+%22Bromance%22

Junior Nick Pevato holds up his "Bro," Greg Cormier.

Siearra Papuga, Staff Writer

“Bromance”: The unconditional, non-homosexual love between a man and his bro.

In this day in age, a very close relationship between two males is often governed by a set of rules or guidelines known as “The Bro Code.”  I have talked to a few LHS boys about these rules to better understand the traits of a “Bromance.”  Also, Barney Stinson, author of The Bro Code, has published a set of rules that governs the brotherly code of conduct.

Rule #1- Bros before [Chicks].  The bond between two men is stronger than that between man and woman because, on an average, men are stronger then woman.  That’s just science.

“It’s me before girls,” says junior Wes Nelson, “Bros before chicks.”

I would like it to be clear to any girlfriend that your boyfriend does not share the same bond with you as he does with his bros.  However, don’t consider this an atrocity, like Stinson says, it’s just science.

Rule #89- A bro shall always say yes in support of another bro.

Junior Matthew Stec is always thinking highly of his fellow bromates and treats them better then any of his other friends.  “Guys expect respect, they expect you to be honest, trustworthy, and to have one another’s back.”

Junior Jose Teo believes that bromances are naturally better then girl’s friendships.

“We hardly ever fight, and if we do we get over it 10 minutes later and forget it ever happened.”

Junior Greg Cormier agrees: “You forgive your bro when there’s a stupid situation — forgive and forget.”

Rule # 51- A bro can check out another bro’s date and report back with a thumbs-up or thumbs-down.

On Planet Bromance woman are, at times, thought of as trophies.  Ladies are the show piece to a bro’s hard work.  Bros respect their bromates’ opinions of their girlfriends.  “If I call [his girlfriend] hot, then that just makes him respect and praise her even more,” says Cormier.

Rule #118- When a Bro is with his Bros, he is not a vegetarian.

We all know that the typical man and the typical woman do not have the same diets.  Men scoff down buffalo wings and pizza, while woman poke at their salads and fruit cups.  Bros take eating junk food to the next level: “Chips, soda, and pizza,” says Nelson, “basically [any] junk-food.”

When watching sports? ” Taco Bell, because it’s cheap,” says juniors Joe Francisco and Senior Brett Bohl simultaneously.

Fast food is the ultimate bro’s fest.  Dollar menu, $0.96 burrito, or the McDouble.  Any thousand-calorie meal is ordered, picked up, or delivered as a bro delight.

“We fast food it up a lot,” add Cormier.

Rule #2- A bro is always entitled to do something stupid as long as the rest of his bros are all doing it.

“We run around stealing things from people’s yards and put it in other peoples’ [yards] because it’s funny,” says Francisco.  “People wake up and there are just crazy things in their yard.”

As close as bros are, unnecessary touching is a no-no. Rule #119- When three Bros must share the backseat of a car, it is unacceptable for any Bro to put his arm around another Bro to increase space.

Don’t even try to understand the language of two bros who’ve beem together a while because according to Cormier, bros “speak in their own language and understand every inside joke possible.”

Shotty, no blitz, no Milán Lucic. (As overheard from a conversation between Cormier and Nick Pevato while running toward the car.)

In the world of the bros, riding shot gun (the passenger seat) is a very serious issue.  Sitting shot gun is the equivalent of sitting in the king’s throne.  He is controller of the radio and first to call the next destination.

This bro-bond is only important for one reason.  A reason that every bro has answered in some sort of phrasing of, “Having a good time.”

As a female who surrounds herself with this type of “bro” behavior, I’ve noticed that every group of boys has their own unique definition to describe this bro code. However, I can’t help but think of the same cliché line to fill the slot: boys will be boys.