The Scourge of my Squeaky Sneakers


Peter Mentekidis, Editorial Editor

My sneakers squeak a lot, and it never ceases to irritate me.

I have two pairs of shoes that I wear to school: a pair of black and red Nikes, and a grey and white pair of Nikes. Both of these pairs share one thing in common, aside from both of them being Nike running shoes: they both squeak like mad once I walk around in them for a couple of minutes. All the time. And it’s driving me crazy.

They both squeak in different areas, and one is more severe than the other. The grey ones aren’t particularly bad. They squeak in the top left side of the left shoe. It’s a mild squeak; I can hardly feel it myself. Regardless, it’s still there. It’s a small, unwavering presence: kind of like a nest of mice scurrying around in your bedroom walls, or a broken heater quietly rattling in the back of a classroom. It’s irritating but I can still manage to go about my daily business without losing my marbles.

My black pair is when I start to get exasperated. The squeak comes from the middle of the right shoe, straight down the widest part of the sole, from the left end to the right. And it is LOUD. You can hear my shoe squeak all the way from here to Tuscaloosa. Compared to my other pair, it’s like a gun going off. It’s a loud, pronounced squeak: one produced from the deepest part of the sole, ringing on for a second before it passes. It’s beautifully antagonizing, really. . Also, this shoe HURTS when it squeaks. I’m not sure why, but my foot KILLS after wearing this pair for more than half the school day. My foot feels like I walked the Appalachian trail carrying a horse. On one foot. With leaden socks.  It’s only on the shoe that squeaks, too.

The worst part is that they only squeak in school. Seriously. I’ve walked in other places with these shoes (surprising, I know), and they only squeak when I walk around in school. I swear I’m not crazy. I don’t really have an explanation for why they only squeak in school. Maybe it’s the old, over-waxed linoleum floors. Maybe I’m just crazy. Really, what am I doing? I’m spending the little time I have to spare whining about my squeaky shoes online. 

It’s a little sad, frankly. The worst part is that there’s no real solution to come out about writing it. The only real solution to be had is to buy another pair of shoes, which I’ve already done. A nice pair of Converse, too.

And they still squeak.